Being a better me, as if it was even possible

So I'm on this new fasting thing now. Not fasting from food, that would kill me. Fasting from things I don't need in my life. Temporarily anyway. Trying to be a better me and what have you. Here are a list of things I am giving up/doing for an undetermined amount of time..... #1-Porn. And everything along with it. I REALLY need to lay off the porn. It was never a problem, just an obstacle. Besides, "porn is bad for the soul." May be the reason why I look at every woman as an object for my pleasure rather than a subordinate like I should. #2-Alcohol. I'm not giving it up by any means. Just seriously cutting back. No more one or two drinks here and there. I'll just be drinking (heavily) on special occasions. Special like the opening weekend at The Track, holidays, birthdays, and Tuesdays. What isn't special about a Tuesday? Well, I may get a good buzz if a girl asks me to come out. Wouldn't want them to get drunk by themselves. #3- Going to the gym. This is one of those things I'm beginning to do. I highly recommend it, especially if you want to get rid of the "tit-rack" or the "tool-shed." I feel like a new man afterwards and an old man the next day, but its worth it. Its also cheaper than sponsering a Third World kid or going to a bar. For just pennies a day (or the cost of 4-5 drinks a month), I can save my liver/dignity. Its really all about me in the end. If you want to work out and its 11pm or so, call me. #4-Less TV. More movies. Ever see my eyes glaze over when you're talking to me? It's because I stopped listening ten minutes ago. I have an insanely short attention span and a bad short term memory. If it didn't happen on last weeks episode, I don't remember. It you don't keep referring to the topic of the conversation, you've lost me. Hence the me-never-answering-the-phone. While you're telling me about your day, I am clipping my toenails or eating a granola bar. I figure watching more movies will help me learn to pay attention. We'll see. #5- Eat better, and more often. It kinda goes along with the gym thing. More fiber, more vitamins, less grease, no fast food. I'm hooked on these vitamin waters now. And ginseng tea. Stanima is thru the roof now. You know, for those long nights.....at the gym. More veggies (I'm 24 now, and I still call them 'veggies'), more fish and chicken, no pork, less frozen meals. I'm not a health nut. Not even close. Although I do eat oatmeal every morning for the past 2 years. When I die, it won't be from motherfucking heart disease (a car crash, no doubt). Out of all of these, my quest for eating healthy may fail. I feel good about the porn thing. I have the will power of a 16 year-old in an empty 7-11 at 2am, but I believe I can manage.