The girl that got away...

It's an over-used cliche, but it seems to hold true. When you're in your mid-to-late twenties, you start thinking about what could have been or what should have been. You start thinking about bad decisions and just all-around mistakes you've made in previous relationships. Wondering if you rushed things or didn't, saw things for what they weren't, didn't see things for what they were, or rethinking what you thought was a good idea to not being such a good idea. When a relationship ends for reasons other than relationship problems, those are the ones you wish you could do over. Those are the worst break-ups. The ones that neither of you could do anything about. Whether it be a misunderstanding, one of you had to move, or you were just at different times in your life. That is 'the girl that got away'. The girl that you've moved on from, but never really got over. You wish you would have met a few years later, then maybe it would be different. You wonder if it wasn't for -fill in blank-, you'd still be together. Nothing that tears you up inside, but it occationally makes you wonder, "What would life be like if things were like they had been?" I have such a girl. Or had such a girl, as it were. Two actually. One of them doesn't really count because she was the 'high school sweetheart'. Most everybody wonders about that one. "What if we met 5 years later....we were only kids." Nothing more than that. She happened to be a little crazy. So its more like, "What if she wasn't so crazy." I do actually wonder that. Regardless for what happened, she's still the ruler I use to measure others against. I don't know why that is. The scary part: Only one girl has surpassed that yard stick. This other girl is truly the one I wish I still had. She was close to perfect. Which basically means for me, I never got a chance to find something petty to despise (its in my nature). Circumstances dictated that what we had couldn't continue, which sucks, but what can you do. There's nothing that I could have done that wouldn't drastically alter my life and there was nothing she could have done that wouldn't screw up her future. What was best for me was...well, her. What was best for her wasn't necessarily me. Its just how life works. Some things are bigger than the two of you. Which you have to understand and then move on. If you don't, it'll eat you alive, which is never good. That goes for anything really. If you dwell on the bad, the good passes you by. I'd rather dwell on the good and have the bad pass me by, but that's not how it works. The fact that I've dedicated this much time to type it out is bad enough. Against my better judgment, I did it anyway. I still like to think if we see each other in a couple years, once again single, sparks will still fly. Wishful thinking I guess. So I moved on, but never got over. It seems to be the guy thing to do. Women have this thing in their DNA that enables them to effectively erase (emotionally) any guy that she's had any type of relationship with. I can see how that can come in handy at times like these. A man can be completely in love with someone, married even, but when he sees that 'girl who got away', the feelings are still there 100%. Women seem to believe the guy they are with is always better than all the ones before. So their current boyfriend is always the best ever. Our current girlfriend is just a shadow of 'the girl', and we secretly measure the two together. Sucks for them. But really us.