Fat girls and red flags

Almost every man will bang a fat girl in his lifetime. Whether she’s big-boned, chubby, heavy-set, or pregnant; they’re actually good at what they do, believe it or not. There’s no shame in it. Call it an untapped (literally) resource. Plus, there’s T&A galore. And in the end, that's what it's really about. One day a few years ago, I got hit on by these two girls in a hospital (yes, a hospital) parking lot (red flag #1). It was this girl and her little, fat (red flag #2) friend. In her defense, she had a cute face. Hehe. So I was like whatever, exchanged numbers, thought nothing of it, and I went about my day. About two weeks later, I had something set up that was abruptly canceled. In attempt to salvage my day, I did a quick search through my phonebook and I came across the fat chick’s number. Knowing I could hook up that very same day, I called her. This went on for a week or so before I grew bored of her coming to my place, so I went to hers. She lived up in Hilltop, which is the shittiest neighborhood in a 60-mile radius. It made my late-night booty calls sorta dangerous. This one night I went over there, I thought I was gonna get carjacked. Although when they found out whom I was coming to see, they smiled (red flag #3) and we started bullshitting. I strolled up to the door and was greeted with Kool-Aid. Yes, red Kool-Aid (red flag #4). That’s what I call being a good host. After ten minutes or so of boredom, I figure I need to do what I came to do and be on my way. As I ushered her 16-year-old brother out of the house (I use the term ‘house’ loosely), he tried to sell me some weed, then said we should kick it sometime. He wants to hang out with the stranger that is banging his older sister while his friends watched through the window (red flag #5). Needless to say, that was the last time I called her. I went beyond my limit of red flags that night. I ended up calling her friend from then on. Disclaimer: There is nothing wrong with being a little overweight. So please refrain from the hate mail.