The Psycho Ex-Girlfriend ChroniclesSixth Entry

<---Fifth Entry What would a bad relationship be without regret. Probably a good one. My ex was driving me to work one night at my overnight job as she had been doing all winter. When we pulled into the parking lot, she decided to park in the back instead of driving up to the front. In my head, I’m thinking this is the start of a very ugly night. Her- I want to talk to you about something. Me- Can we do this after work? Her- No. Me- Please? Her- Fine. Have fun at work. Me- Ok? I go about my night like any other night when my phone starts going off. Hmmm, I bet she’s still in the parking lot. Her- I need to talk to you right now. Me- (genuinely concerned) What’s wrong, baby? Her- Do you love me? Me- Of course I do. Is everything ok? Her- I don’t know. I think so. I don't know. Me- Can this wait till after work, babe? Wrong thing to say. Her- Blah blah blah (goes on for five minutes or so) blah blah blah. Do you ever care about anything? Something about something. You don't love me! Yadda yadda yadaa. I’m pregnant! Holy shit! Her- …and yes, its yours. It fucking better be. So I get off of work to continue this conversation in person. “Ummm, I have a family emergency.” It was kinda true. According to Chris Rock, I said one of only two things I was allowed to say... (its all funny, but I'm talking about the 3:10 mark) Me- What are you gonna do? Her- I don’t know. Me- Whatever it is, I'm completely behind you. I’m such a great boyfriend. We (mostly she) decided we weren’t ready. Sure, I guess we weren't. Whatever. We went through the proper channels and finally found ourselves at the ‘unholy’ place a few weeks later. Being there just felt illegal. Almost like we were attending a secret civil rights meeting in the 50's. The legal limit (we were told) was three months, we were just shy of two. When they called her name, I looked her right in the eye and made my final attempt. Me- I don’t want you to do this. Her- What? Me- We can do this. We can make it work. Her- We can’t. Me- Yes we can. Don’t do it. Her- We’re already here. Whaaaaaa?!? We’re already here!? Was she serious? That’s her excuse? What the fuck? I’m a decent person, so I wasn’t gonna make her feel like a shitty person about her decision. I held her hand and that was that. Saying it was a distrubing experiance would be like saying Hitler wasn't a nice guy. Yeah, understatement of the year. **Side note: Whatever you may believe in, I do not recommend such a choice. You die a little inside. Unless you're a robot.** For the rest of our relationship, she always used that as a crutch against me like it was my choice. "I did that for us, and now -insert current fight here-." Bullshit. One of her arguments was it would have hindered her career as an aspiring 'entertainer', for lack of specifity and keeping the somewhat innocent still innocent. After we broke up, I did some math (which I'm surprisingly good at) and realized the possible window of conception was a span of four or five days where I was only with her for two of them. The other couple of days she was on a camping trip with a youth group. Coincidence? It may explain her refusal to change her mind. Or maybe she was just selfish. Either way, I’m glad she’s not the mother of my child. Fucking Psycho. After typing this, I'm starting to feel like a horrible person. It’ll pass, I'm sure. It always does. Seventh Entry --->