The Psycho Ex-Girlfriend ChroniclesThe Index

There's an epilogue to my tale of humor/sadness Fate has a way of biting me in the ass. Examples: -I was forced to move in with my mother after being kicked out of our apartment. Soon after, she moved back in with her parents. Her parents lived within walking distance from my mom. I had to pass it every day to drop my brother off at school. Awkward. Probably made me look like a stalker or something. -Years later, I got an aparment directly across the street (and owned by the same fucks that banned me) from the one I vowed to "never return to". -When I officially began a relationship with a recent girlfriend, I was at a friend's wedding. My friend's wedding was at the same venue where I attended my prom with, you guessed it, the ex. Looking back at it all, the good times definitely out-weighed the bad. Although, the bad weighed a shitload. Its like saying the tumor only takes up a 10% of my leg. Compare that to my hand and my hand is gone. Bad analogy, but you get the point. I do have a lot more stories that I could share, but exactly how much of an asshole do I wanna be? Honestly, if I shared any more, it'd be a little easier to find out who she is and for her to sue me in some way. That wouldn't be very neighborly of me. Also, I made it a point to not share anything that didn't directly involve me. Now, if I were offered a book deal or a movie-type offer, then I might buckle. ...and I do have movie material. There is some shit. Here is an index of my infamous misfortune: First Entry- She dares me to let her get raped. Second Entry- Things get physical. Third Entry- She costs me my job. Fourth Entry- I lost more female friends this way. Fifth Entry- She beat herself so I wouldn't have to. Sixth Entry- "I'm pregnant....and yes, its yours." Seventh Entry- One of many failed hotel getaways. Eighth Entry- Another girl told me that she loved me. Not smart on her part. Ninth Entry- An apartment trashing. Tenth Entry- "You showered without me?" Eleventh Entry- I was dumped. Me. How funny is that shit? Twelfth Entry- Her car is stolen on our 'break'. Thirteenth Entry- Cops, strip club, and another guy. The End. Fourteenth Entry- Collecting my shit. Edit: I came across an actual store that sells apparel for these crazy bitches. I laughed.